I remember few years ago when I used to text Mushy at either very late night or earliest in the morning to confess feelings for the day like a real dairy. Stuffs like, "I'm sad today because of the same reasons why you are. Doubled by the fact that you are", "You are prettiest today", "That kiss, it must've done something bad, or good to me, I don't know. But sure I can't stop thinking of it now". Even big stuff like "I love you" and other stuff that I lack the courage to tell at your face in the middle of the day. Oh that's me when I develop these occasional little wings and do cooing. But let me borrow a teacher friend's quote of 'so slow but at least I'm moving' to justify that. It payed when I know you're waiting for my daily soliloquy. I know you missed that. Believe me, I do, too. But the little chicken developed something more braver than that.
Here I want to tell you that I'm proud of you, for being a good person, above anything else. For crying, because you think you're messed up and you don't want it. I'm proud because you didn't become cold and tough no matter how hard this big stuff of adversity hit you. For having the decency of feeling guilty about missing your responsibilities, because it is when we admit our mistakes that we do something about it. I'm proud of you because you don't dwell on the bad things for long. You could get up every morning wishing me good mornings and go to work while every bones and muscles in your body ache. I'm proud because you work with conscience which I find rarely these days.
I wake and get up everyday because there's something I'd look forward to, you. The inspiration you are giving me is stronger than gravity that pulls me back to this mattress. And I want you to know that. I know what you are capable of doing. Mediocrity isn't your stuff.
PS. Have you forgotten about me? You're not alone. <3
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