To Eongrey

Like you've always been.

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Little Chicken says good morning to Mushy

It's 430 am and raining like there's no breaking dawn close. My brother is sleeping like a log. I just went up to pee but had trouble getting back to sleep. So I decided to pick up this machine sitting coldly at the floor beside our mattress and start scribbling on it instead.

I remember few years ago when I used to text Mushy at either very late night or earliest in the morning to confess feelings for the day like a real dairy. Stuffs like, "I'm sad today because of the same reasons why you are. Doubled by the fact that you are", "You are prettiest today", "That kiss, it must've done something bad, or good to me, I don't know. But sure I can't stop thinking of it now". Even big stuff like "I love you" and other stuff that I lack the courage to tell at your face in the middle of the day. Oh that's me when I develop these occasional little wings and do cooing. But let me borrow a teacher friend's quote of 'so slow but at least I'm moving' to justify that. It payed when I know you're waiting for my daily soliloquy. I know you missed that. Believe me, I do, too. But the little chicken developed something more braver than that.

Here I want to tell you that I'm proud of you, for being a good person, above anything else. For crying, because you think you're messed up and you don't want it. I'm proud because you didn't become cold and tough no matter how hard this big stuff of adversity hit you. For having the decency of feeling guilty about missing your responsibilities, because it is when we admit our mistakes that we do something about it. I'm proud of you because you don't dwell on the bad things for long. You could get up every morning wishing me good mornings and go to work while every bones and muscles in your body ache. I'm proud because you work with conscience which I find rarely these days.

I wake and get up everyday because there's something I'd look forward to, you. The inspiration you are giving me is stronger than gravity that pulls me back to this mattress. And I want you to know that. I know what you are capable of doing. Mediocrity isn't your stuff.

PS. Have you forgotten about me? You're not alone. <3

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me and mamush's

We bought and made these as compliance to the Department of Procrastination Prevention.

This is where we're going to write what to do's, buy, pay.

(^^,)

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I call it A Year now

I ended last year and started this year with my so-far-all-time-favorite-novel Time Traveller's Wife which Jen gave me as a Christmas gift. So reading the book is officially the first thing I did this year. Then after sometime I went to Makati for Summer Affiliation. Celebrated our second anniversary. Received invisible flower from Jen one morning. Binged over Happiness (French) Fries and Rakenrol (Rocky Road) Sundae. Made it to the leaderboard spot beside Jen in every FB game (except Restaurant City, because she used good cheats there). Tsk. Went to Enchanted Kingdom with the whole batch. Met Jen's bestfriend, Ayen and Ate Itna. And Tot. Went to Jen's old workplace, NSRI. Met Jen's Ex. Checked in in one of UP Houses with Jen. Ate, drank vodka. Made love. Walked around UP with Alki. Had photo op with oble. Watched Kick Ass. Couched potatoed Big Bang Theory (introduced by Ayen), He's Beautiful and Phineas and Ferb. Tried cooking lunch. Did terrible mess in the kitchen. Almost defeated Jen in shooting hoops. Watched PS I Love You more than 5 times. Learned new tricks in Photoshop CS4. Watched PS I Love You again for a couple of times. Swimming with Mark and 2 sibs, Mike, Chester and Jen. Sleeptalk many times (according to Jen). Turned 20. Lost my sanity on my birthday. Crammed. Had my final defense the day after my birthday cancelled. Finally, had my final defense 2 days later. Received monster model, Birthdaymon, as a birthday present from Jen. Watched Sorcerer's Apprentice. Had series of Taho Days with nobody else but Cecil on early morning shifts. Created EonGrey on Photoshop. Played table hockey with Jen. Result: 1-1. Had Karaoke Fridays with Alki, Ayen, Bijo, Maj, Lester and Dennis. Plus Jen. Bought EJ (stuff giraffe) for Jen. Pet EJ everytime I visit him on his shelf. Watched The Notebook with Jen on a rainy day. Watched PNE environmental concert @ BU ground on VIP seats (courtesy by Jen's mom). Another swimming with Mark, Mike, Mam Jules and Jen. Watched The Social Network. Facebooked almost always. Gave Jen piggyback rides. Attended high school reunion with Jen. Had terrible sinusitis. Ate lots of dark chocolates. Ride a vox. Made my first cotton balls in my entire duty history. Enrolled in several review centers. Finally, settled in one. NARRI. Watched Amnesia Girl. Okay, Jen didn't cry on it. That is only because she isn't paying attention to the movie. Won Tap Tap against Jen almost everytime. This month, I dug on Muchaussen's Syndrome. Had my last midterm in college. Watched December moon smiled like Chesire Cat. Watched HP7 DVD rip. Didn't finish HP7. Bought Jen a birthday present of her choice, pink backpack. Met other college buddies of Jen - Rose, Theresa and Princess. Ran luch for Jen and Mam Caryl as they took comprehensive exams. Stood at the back of the door the whole day. Napped at the corridor for 30 minutes. Taken underwater shots. Spent overnight in Tiki Huts @ CWC, Jen almost falling off the bed throughout the night because of Chester. Had my blood extracted for CBC. Pinch-hugged Jen's tummy while extraction. Got a normal blood count except for some mighty WBC. Got a new pair of eyes. Argued over stupid stuff that kept us awake overnight. Bought a cake for Jen. Celebrated her 30th birthday @ her place and pool swimming on the rainy night. Experienced lots of rain. Took pictures of myself. Took pictures of Jen. And us together.FELT LOVE and WAS LOVED incomparably - more than anything else this year. It was a good year.

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Whatabouts

It's true that when you have so much to say so much to tell, words would be scarce even when you try to talk. These past few days, it's been rough. That explains my absences here.

So finally, we decided to enroll in NARRI Nursing Review. It's quite a risk. We don't know how things work with them but due to proximity of the venue, we took it. We there refers to my closest friends, Dyan and Chester. So far, nothing is proving us we made the right decision. But I guess we'll stick with it. Probably just do double time reading and verifying doubtful information they are giving us. TSK.

One reason I want to pursue it is that I could be with Jen almost anytime beyond my review hours because it's in the same campus. And she could walk me to my classroom everyday. And we could have banana split every weekend! Or vodka. Haha. Yay! :))

This is both our final semester. Our there refers to Jen and me. Me, my last semester in college, and Jen her last in masteral. That is if we finished everything before the deadlines. We got a long list of to do's (and not to do's) we try to keep it up.

I really really want to write many things here now, things like new bus rides experience and music and unborn twins and frustrating paper works and why Jen and I spent the whole afternoon in the toilet floor and love. But I'm afraid I have to go and prepare my examination for my student nurses tomorrow. I'm playing head nurse in ER this week. So that's all for now. Gah. I'll be writing something more useful soon!

[This is me keeping up with my promise to my blog. ^^,]

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Whatabouts

Today is the last day of NMAT* registration which Jen and I are supposed to take. But we decided to just wait until next year when our timetables are not this tight. Definitely we can't take it on April because intensive review for NLE** will be starting and Jen needs so much catching up with her masteral. We'll take it next time then.

Guess what? We started piggy banking! It's gonna be December few days from now so we figured out something to fund extra somethings. Plus we have plans. And small projects. I'm excited about it. Hope they'd go all well.

I'm looking forward to meeting Rose and Theresa, Annie, hopefully, and of course other friends of Jen.


*National Medical Admission Test
**Nursing Liscensure Examination

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Whatabouts

It's quite a day in the hospital. One dead, and one absconded. I still feel lucky to have the latter. Others are in mechanical ventilator. Ambu bag. It is a hand-held device that provides ventilation to a patient who is breathing inadequately or not breathing at all. I found myself staring at somebody who is most likely the husband of the patient. I wonder how long could he do that, hold on to that ambu bag (which is technically the only thing that's keeping her alive). But it goes all down to a bittersweet fact: HE'S BREATHING FOR HER 24/7.

By the way, I'm not mad at you, bastard, for escaping and not settling your bill. I just hope you get home safe and well. I'm referring to my patient.

It's rainy and cold tonight. My knees hurt badly. Somehow thankful that I have nothing much to do. This pain is gradually killing me.

The best part of this day would be this hour. With Jen, Joenard, Mark. Mike and Vodka. :)

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Whatabouts

At this very moment, yes while I'm typing this, I am locked in a very tight hugging from my back. It's 7 am, Jen is still deeply asleep.
:)

We went on a night out after working on soil samples (for Jen's thesis) yesterday. With Chester and Dyan, my best high school buddies and other classmates. It was Emman's 20th birthday. We had vodka and beer. Plus chicken strips. Ugh. I hope Jen won't wake up with a hang over. Luckily, I didn't.

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You and Me

EonGrey Mush Potato

( " , ) {*_*}

one for always.

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love from my playlist

Though I'm dead-tired last night, I wasn't able to sleep. So i decided to start a new photoshop project while listening to my playlist. But I stood up til 2am and have these lyrics printed on my grey supposed-to-be-worksheet.

EVERY.CELL.IN.MY.BRAIN.SEEMS.TO.WORK.JUST.FOR.YOU.

YOU,

SOMETIMES

BUT IT'S OKAY

JUST BECAUSE

AND

IT FEELS LIKE EVERYTHING

YES

your greatest fan (who still thinks all the song is written for you),

Mush Potato

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Whats 'nothing' for us

I'll fill my heart with you. Your crooked smile and cruel nose. Your strong eyes. I'll miss you so hard. Because I have missed you so much already.

But according to the theory of relativity, each observer has his own measure of time, which is registered on the watch he is wearing. Watches on different observers do not have to register the same measurement of time. Therefore, time evolved into a personal concept, depending on the observer who is measuring it.

I know you remember that for us, time is nothing.

Hold on. I'll be waiting for you, love...

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Almost lomo

words by jen arbo

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hey, earthling!

happy birthday, my little sunshine.

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I could have written something like this for you but Pablo Neruda already did

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1.8

20thmushy.day.

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How beautiful you are

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november 2

I'll love you until like it's 19x100 months.

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Ang Girlfriend Mong Baduy

I'd rather express this in Tagalog, para mas malupet. Tulad ng pagmamahal ko sayo. (@@,)

Malamang tulog ka na. Pero ako eto gising na gising pa. Naisip ko kasi lahat mula nung araw na nakilala kita. Kung pagkekwentuhin ako ng buhay ko, ikaw ang ikekwento ko, kasi ikaw na naging buong buhay ko (mas marami pa ang kwentong Mushy kesa sa kwentong buhay ko talaga). Nakakalimutan ko na din yung ibang mga pangarap ko. Kasi natupad na yung pinakamagarbo, yung pangarap kong ibigin ka. Wahaha. Linya mo yan, di ba? Pahiram na lang. Pero di nga, totoo 'yon. Ganun naman kasi talaga. Dati akala ko may mga bagay na pinapangarap lang talaga at hanggang dun na lang din. Bumabaliktad tyan ko pag andyan ka na. Ang hirap, halos maglaho ako sa hiya tuwing tinititigan mo ko noon. Kaya gusto kong mag-cartwheels sa tuwa nung nalaman kong parehas lang pala tayo ng pangarap. Haaay. Ang ibigin ang isa't isa! (._.) Bago pa 'yon, buong araw tayo magkausap sa text, hanggang makauwi ka galing eskwelahan at makatulog. 'Pag nakakatulog ka kinakausap na lang kita ng tulog gaya nito (namiss ko din ginagawa 'to), sinasabi ko lahat ng di ko nasasabi pag gising ka. Hindi naman talaga ako mahilig magtext pero ewan..lakas mo! Akala ko noon wala akong pag-asa sayo. Tinatawag mo pa kong kiddo. Naman! Hay. Pero alam mo bang kahit noon pa ikaw ang happiest thought ko. Sinulat ko paulit ulit pangalan mo nung Algebra namin. Habang naiisip ko yung holding hands sa ilalim ng mesa (hehe), na nilalabanan ng mga walang kwenta kong theories. Tapos naging tayo. Kahit kami pa din. Gusto kong humingi ng tawad dahil sa ganung sitwasyon "tayo" nagumpisa, dahil nasasaktan ka. Bakit naman kasi late ka? Late ka sa eskwela, late ka gumising..lagi kang late..pati pagdating sa buhay ko late pa rin! Ikaw lang pala inaantay ko eh. Pero hindi ko yata kayang ikaw ang mawala kahit wala ng ibang matira sakin. Naisip ko nun tae, OK lang yun. :) Hindi ko naman kailangan ng maraming tao para bumuo ng mundo. Kahit ikaw lang, solb na. Kahit sa kaunting panahong nakilala kita wala nang mas hihigit pa sa pinaramdam mong pagmamahal. Mula nung araw na 'yon, buong buhay na kong masaya.

Salamat sa pagdating sa buhay ko. (._.)

You always say, "sorry for all these". I say, thank you for all these.

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to mushy

the soul has no memory but i know deep within my heart i love you even before i was born. and something really tells me that you loved me too in the past. for i never learned of such love stronger than time. my love for you is much more antique than time itself..

-mush potato

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Superpets!

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